Kroger Has Some Sensationally Superb Store Policy

We went to Kroger tonight (it’s the beginning of the month and we just got our food budget $) to buy the essentials, milk, cheese, ice cream and dark chocolate. We generally go through the self-checkout lines (ever think that you are working for Kroger for free when you do this?) because many times we will have to do separate orders, like if we are buying toiletries and food, we have to ring up the toiletries separate and pay with the toiletry money and then ring the food up and pay for it with food money. Plus you don’t ever have any of those awkward conversations with that guy you went to elementary school with but haven’t seen in over a decade.

So anyways, we are owning Kroger like the shopping champs we are, corralling all the good deals, throwing items across 4 aisles into the buggy, finding and eating all the free food, you get the idea. We come across our favorite cereal (Kashi GoLean Crunch) and the smaller boxes are on sale, about a dollar off. So of course we buy two boxes. We do the rest of our rat killin’ and then make our way to the golden self-checkout lines. We scan our Kroger card (pretty sure we will be able to pay cash for a yacht someday with all the money we save) and hear that sweet angelic voice (whom will now be referred to as Miss Tetrasaur) say “Welcome valued customer”. So we start scanning our food through, being careful to place each item in a bag before we scan the next item so sweet Miss Tetrasaur won’t start belittling us and threaten to notify the attendant. We get to our cereal boxes and scan them in only to discover that they aren’t on sale!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So we run back to where the “healthy” cereal is and discover that the sale actually ended like 2 weeks ago, they just hadn’t taken down the signs for it. The huge box of GoLean crunch is on sale, however, but only like 40 cents off. So we just count our losses, grab a big box, and take it back to our checkout line.

If you have ever gone through a self-checkout and had to cancel an item after it has already been scanned, you know exactly the frustration and blood pressure changes your body experiences during the course of the cancellation. You have to select the item, remove ONLY the canceled item (otherwise Miss Tetrasaur will surely voice her opinion), and then give it to the attendant, who is usually asleep or talking to their significant other over on aisle 6.

So we get out big box of cereal, scan it through and place it with the other groceries. Then we delete one of the smaller boxes of cereal that were no longer on sale and living a lie. Miss Tetrasaur makes us give the cereal to the attendant and we notify him that we have another box of cereal that we must delete so he might as well hang around. He asks us if everything was ok and why we were deleting both small boxes of cereal. We explained the entire situation to him and he informs us that both of our small boxes of cereal are free! It’s Kroger policy, he says. If something is advertised for sale in the store but the sale has actually already ended (false advertising, now that I think of it) then you get the item for free!!!

Well this completely changes everything!! No longer shall we shop at Kroger so much as we will be scouring every aisle for all the sales to find out which ones have expired and not been taken down properly. Hey, we don’t make the policy!